|
|
|
| Name: |
|
Ethan Scott (Capt) (Core member) |
| Call sign: |
|
Outhouse |
| Number: |
|
37 |
| Position: |
|
Boat Anchor |
| Marker: |
|
Tippmann A-5 R/T |
| Quote: |
|
You gonna eat that? |
| Place of Origin: |
|
Metro Newark outfall system |
| Bio: |
|
After escaping from a Judge mandated naval career this player evolved into a lumper. When manual labor became his bain, he decided the only thing left for him to do was to travel to various fire departments throughout the country and cause hate and discontent. Known for his Sumo Wrestler stance on the field, our anchor and we do literally mean anchor, is known to shoot anything and everything on the other side of the field. Just watch out for the occasional stray aimed for Story Time. With his New Jersey thought process, we have a hard time understanding what the hell he is actually talking about, but on the field… you want him on your side. |
| Name: |
|
Scott Beaudoin (Co-Capt) (Core member) |
| Call sign: |
|
Sticks |
| Number: |
|
3 |
| Position: |
|
Tent Peg |
| Marker: |
|
Tippmann 98 Custom R/T |
| Quote: |
|
Get your face fucked! Ya like apples? |
| Place of Origin: |
|
Broom Closet |
| Bio: |
|
After a tragic accident involving a wood chipper and pencil sharpener this little toothpick of a guy needed direction. A stint in the Air Force and many trips to the desert made him very knowledgeable of what can and can not be inserted into body cavities. A little camouflage and no body mass, this character can hide in just about any location and little difference can be made between him and the native saplings. You may think that he’s rocking a response trigger, but do not be fooled. Due to his addiction to sugar and caffeine, this is just a adverse side effect. |
| Name: |
|
Adam Peterson (Core member) |
| Call sign: |
|
A-D |
| Number: |
|
24 |
| Position: |
|
Free Lance Individual |
| Marker: |
|
Smart Parts Tactical Ion |
| Quote: |
|
Sorry… I’m hit… again. |
| Place of Origin: |
|
A tree house |
| Bio: |
|
After moving from Seattle to escape a paternity suit, this wonder of humanity has found himself in trouble yet again. Having no personal or intimate knowledge of either sexual activity or paintball we have adopted this elongated, coffee drinking, sub-intelligent Sci-Fi geek. Ask him to spell something in Latin, well you’d actually better not. He is completely unable to fully operate a writing implement with the control of a two year old but will light your ass up in a paint exchange. Never to be underestimated on the field of battle, this player is your savior when it comes to accuracy by volume. Capable to shoot over the tallest bunker on the field, a simple stone wall will bring him crashing down. |
| Name: |
|
Larry Cabral (Apple Corps) |
| Call sign: |
|
Story time |
| Number: |
|
13 |
| Position: |
|
Semi Midfielder / Professional Gear Watcher |
| Marker: |
|
Tippmann A-5 R/T |
| Quote: |
|
Ya know what, ya know let me tell you something! |
| Place of Origin: |
|
The halls of Montezuma |
| Bio: |
|
This distant descendant of Chesty Puller (so claimed) has more money in the bank than the Federal Reserve, yet can never seem to have an operating marker. After his tour of the shores of Tripoli, this semi- midfielder single handedly ran President Taft’s personal protective service. Or no wait, it was Truman, no it was Teddy Roosevelt, and well it was somebody. Colonel MarDet called him on it. Having his son on the team allows Story Time to impart a certain sense of knowledge of tactics and principles, even though they are not accepted by any sovereign nation, with the exception of France. Our happy go lucky, yet always in crisis mid-fielder is loyal and will give you his last pod of paint, simply because he didn’t play that day. |
| Name: |
|
Mark Luther (Hard Core) |
| Call sign: |
|
CHAOS |
| Number: |
|
33 |
| Position: |
|
H. M. F. I. C. ( at least in his mind) |
| Marker: |
|
Spyder |
| Quote: |
|
Because I said so! |
| Place of Origin: |
|
The Bristol Highlands |
| Bio: |
|
This stand-out member of our team is the only person in the world who actually enjoys punishment. Whether it’s being married about 10 times or having various parts of his anatomy placed in a bench vice, this crazy man will keep up the fight. After moving back to his ancestral land of Bristol RI and eventually immigrating to Newport, he has sought to be every young mans dream… an asshole with authority. Being and Assistant Fire Chief and a former Army Drill Sergeant, he has a lot of mental issues and pent up aggression. We usually pat him on the head, toss him a bottle of Captain Morgan and call it a day. Count your hits from him and you’ll see one thing… everyone can do better with a little blood in the alcohol system. |
| Name: |
|
Dennis (Bobo) Gregory (Rotten to the Core) |
| Call sign: |
|
Second Coming |
| Number: |
|
25 |
| Position: |
|
Professional Drain Clogger |
| Marker: |
|
BT-4 Combat |
| Quote: |
|
Ummmmph. |
| Place of Origin: |
|
Swamps of Southern Florida |
| Bio: |
|
Hailing from the back woods of some country bumpkin town in Indiana by way of The swamps and dark places of southern Florida, this long lost cousin on the Sasquatch has spent some time at sea and a lot of time in the Fire House. Always on the hunt for the elusive “Big Titty Bitch” this bearer of bad tiding will shoot you, stomp you, bludgeon you then stand you up and get you a beer. When agitated, this behemoth will get into a crouching position, beat his chest and the ground with his bloody knuckles and open up an extra large can of whoop ass. Never to be under estimated, our primate back player will end your round early. |
| Name: |
|
Lance Cabral (Crab Apple Core) |
| Call sign: |
|
Babe |
| Number: |
|
13 ½ |
| Position: |
|
Sherpa |
| Marker: |
|
Tippmann A-5 |
| Quote: |
|
Dude did you see me get that guy? |
| Place of Origin: |
|
The loins of Larry |
| Bio: |
|
Being the first born spawn of Story Time, this young man has had to endure countless nights of how his father masterminded the battle of little big horn. Always willing to swap a pod of “good” paint for some of yours, he will always be the one guy on the field you won’t hit. Not that he’s a master of stealth, but he’s usually found on a different field of play than the rest. With no real sense of direction on the field of play, or in life, it’s no wonder we find him lost among the trees. |
| Name: |
|
Kevin O’Leary (Angry to the Core) |
| Call sign: |
|
Bronze |
| Number: |
|
18 |
| Position: |
|
Already assumed |
| Marker: |
|
Model 98 |
| Quote: |
|
You gotta be fucking kidding me! |
| Place of Origin: |
|
On the bar room floor of the local pub. |
| Bio: |
|
Our resident nutritionist and all around Adonis is a member of the team that is required to have supervision at all times. Known for his charm and good fashion sense, he has a temper that has been compared to Charles Manson. A short temper and a streak of Irish zeal in him, he’ll be the last off the field with you… looking for you… wanting to beat you. You’ve read about broken shit in the parking lot, well this is the guy right here. He’s that guy. |
| Name: |
|
Jared Grant (Metal Core) |
| Call sign: |
|
Ringo |
| Number: |
|
4/4 |
| Position: |
|
On the throne |
| Marker: |
|
Rental |
| Quote: |
|
A One and a Two |
| Place of Origin: |
|
The outback of Oregon, a little off the beaten trail |
| Bio: |
|
This solid addition to our team is one of the newest converts to the beloved sport of Woodsball. With a sure shot, he can take you down at a range of 10 to 12 feet. If he’s not lighting your ass up at close range he’s tapping out a battle cadence on his portable bongos. A spry, wiry lad by nature, don’t let it fool you… he packs a mean 300 rounds and isn’t afraid to use them. After relocating himself from the West Coast, he settled himself in a seated position Flying his Kite Upright. Not to be out done in any way shape or form, he will sacrifice himself in the name of Rock! Tap Tap Tippy Tap Tap!!! |
| Name: |
|
Andrew Haley (Core Processing Unit) |
| Call sign: |
|
Mr. Anderson |
| Number: |
|
00 |
| Position: |
|
Webmaster /Resident techno weenie |
| Marker: |
|
Dell Pentium III |
| Quote: |
|
Begin with Review and Friend |
| Place of Origin: |
|
Just left of Neptune Massive |
| Bio: |
|
If he’s not working diligently on our team’s website, he’s either searching the paintball field for Wi-Fi or rising faster than his bubbles. Known for his wiz-bang knowledge of computer binary systems, our team’s webmaster and a loyal shooter is known for not being able to sit still for longer than 2.3 seconds. In the event of him not actually hitting you with a paintball, he’ll either run you down with his jeep or develop a computer program to do the same. Don’t mess with this hardliner, or you’ll end up with a virus. An avid bird caller and sock drawer organizer, this webmaster is like the Energizer Bunny. He keeps going and going and going and going and going and going… in his wet suit. |
|
